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Behavior Information |
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The Arrogant
Action: Identify causes of misbehavior.
Pinpoint student needs being revealed.
Employ specific methods, procedures, and techniques at school and at home for getting the child to modify or change his/her behavior.
- Primary Causes of Misbehavior
- Attention
This student has a strong need to be recognized by peers and adults.
- Primary Needs Being Revealed
- Sexuality
The student may be experiencing family problems or other difficulties with people interactions.
- Escape from Pain
The struggle to relate to people may be very painful.
- Secondary Needs Being Revealed
- Power
This student needs to learn that he/she counts, by being recognized for what he/she does or is. It's important that this be done in order to create a positive form of power.
- Status
Every attempt should be made to assist this student to develop a positive self-concept.
- Never surrender to your gut reaction to "level." It won't work.
- Try the "Seed Planting" technique. Seed planting is responding to the student's words or actions with one sentence of objective truth, and stopping there. You can say such things as "Do you really think that is true?" "Are you sure?" "Do you think that's really that good an idea?" or "Your success doesn't seem to be making you happy." Seed planting serves several purposes. First, it makes the child think. Second, you can use it publicly without belittling or putting him/her down in any way. Third, it gets the student ready for in-depth conversations and counseling. And getting the student ready for counseling is half the task insofar as changing the behavior is concerned. Fourth, it makes the student think that you're pretty smart and may be worth talking to and listening to.
- Confer with the student privately. More than one such discussion will be necessary.
- Use the in-depth approach in all discussions. The student must be engaged in a meaningful and in-depth discussion regarding whatever he/she is being arrogant about. This takes time-and a willing attitude about giving of your time. Serious conferences change fake arrogance into real knowledge and hold the student accountable instead of allowing him/her to continue acting superior.
- Appeal to the student's ego. If the student sees that you recognize any special ability, he/she will think you are smart, and may even believe you're the only one wise enough to see his/her potential. Then you can do some meaningful teaching. For instance, tell the student that his/her initial and surface thinking is very good, but that he/she is missing some points-including seeing and respecting the skills of others.
- Help the student capitalize on his/her intellectual abilities by giving challenging assignments, extra reading, class reports, essays, and other opportunities to expand knowledge and to show it. Remember, this child is trying to be somebody.
- Do not fight or "put down" the arrogant student. Rather, realize that this student needs to be taught how to act to get what he/she wants: status, power, and autonomy. To get the student to listen, talk about being sharp, mature, responsible-and show how behaviors other than these work against him/her.
- In a private conference, discuss precise behavior that is unacceptable, making sure the student understands the problem.
- Create an atmosphere of acceptance of the student and the specific knowledge or attitudes he/she can bring to the class. It's often in a denial of these strengths that the problem is accented.
- Give the student an opportunity to express knowledge and abilities through special projects. He/she needs additional responsibilities and may be bored.
- In private sessions, always challenge the student to prove his/her ability to handle the special gifts he/she claims. You might tell the student, "Talk is cheap."
- Talk to him/her about potential. Explain that true potential is a gift that helps one bring others into his/her orbit-not push them away. In the process, remind the student that unused potential means nothing and that achievement, not potential, is the real issue.
- Use the "Narrative" technique. Here, you can relate stories of people who had great abilities and potential, but failed because they couldn't get along with people. Also, relate that 85% of all people who lose or leave jobs do so because of people problems, not inability to do their work.
- Be very careful not to show any arrogance of your own, no matter how mad you get. If you do, you only prove to the student that the biggest ego is the winner.
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