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Four Steps Model
Step 1: Identify the Behavior
Step 2: Understand the Effects
Step 3: Identify the Cause
Step 4: Avoid Mistakes

Related Behaviors
The Angry
The Bully
The Defier
The Influencer
The Overly Aggressive
You Can Handle Them All

Primary Causes of Misbehavior


Lack of self-confidence is also a cause of misbehavior. Children who lack self-confidence honestly expect failure.

They don’t feel they have the ability to function in the classroom—but may feel completely adequate outside school or when they’re supposed to be doing something connected with school. They frustrate us as parents because they are often capable of handling their schoolwork successfully—but they don’t. We are angered because we feel their behavior is a cop-out. It is—except they really think they can’t win in school.

These children use inability—real or assumed—to escape participation. When they are supposed to be doing their homework, they play and look for distractions instead. Then they make excuses like “I couldn’t do it” or “I’m dumb.” No amount of parental encouragement seems to make difference to them.

You can identify Lack of Self-Confidence as the cause of the inappropriate behavior by the feeling the behavior generates within you. When Lack of Self-Confidence is the cause of the misbehavior, you will generally feel Frustrated.

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